Freudian slip: an unintentional error regarded as revealing subconscious feelings.
Ever have a Freudian slip when introducing yourself? I did just recently. As I was being introduced to one of my brother’s fans after his performance, I said to her, “Hi, I’m Donnie.” I was as surprised to hear myself say that as anyone else could have been, more so really, because they may have thought I said it intentionally. I had NO idea I was about to say it. Apparently that’s who I feel I am now.
Donnie is my grandmother for whom I am named. I think Donnie is a very cute name for a girl. I still very much regret not letting her call me that when I was little when she wanted to. (Sad Face) And I still very much love remembering my nephew Kyle calling me “Aunt Donnie” when he was little. OMG, he had me wrapped around his little finger!
Since I became a grandmother myself – quite suddenly and with no notice – 19 months ago, I’ve been having a bit of a grandmother name crisis.
MANY years ago, I told Sarah than when I have grandchildren someday I’ve decided my name will be “Darling.” She smiled and said, “No” in the tone one might use with a silly child about to attempt something foolish. We both laughed and went on with our lives.
Last year, when this little guy suddenly showed up, I was thinking probably Grammie, but I always thought Gammie (no r) was a super-adorable name too, but someone in our family was already using that so I wasn’t sure if it was ok. I asked. It was, so that was it. But it wasn’t. I never felt 100% like that was ME. Once Evan babbled the sound, “Deedah” and I said, “Heeey!” Sarah looked at me funny. More recently, it has seemed several times like he is calling me “DD.” I came up with Gramsy for a while after seeing someone’s post about a Grampsy and Sarah sometimes calls me Momsy, so . . . cute, but… no, back to Gammie, and still almost, but not quite 100% committed to it.
A while back, I had sent out a group text to my family and friends asking if they were in charge of giving me my grandmother name, what would it be. Amanda suggested Nonna or Nonnie because it rhymes with Donna or Donnie. Kyle liked that too. I remembered again “Aunt Donnie” and also Jeff called me Nonna when he was a baby. Smile. My brothers and sis-in-law seemed to like these the best too. Still wasn’t sure. Then the other day, my brother David, speaking to Evan, referred to me as Nonnie, and it just hit the spot in my brain. It felt like he was actually talking about me, rather than like I was playing a part. That’s me. I’m Nonnie. I know at least part of the reason it feels so right is because of the similarity to Donnie. (Also makes sense David saying it would do the trick for me; I’m told he’s the one who named me the first time.)
So that is a very long story to tell you that I am Evan’s Nonnie.